From Why to How

In times of stress, feeling down or something happens that unsettles you it can be very easy to have one of two attitudes.

The first attitude is the victim attitude, making statements like, why has this happened to me, why did I attract this, and I don’t deserve this.

The second attitude is allowing self to continue to feel down. No energy to do a lot, feelings perhaps of being unlovable, not feeling worthy and just generally not being that happy with life. In this place, the same as the first, it’s easy to ask why am I feeling like this, why am I down, why am I feeling unlovable?

However where does asking the WHY question get you? Does it solve anything? Does this conversation with yourself or even others move you forward? Afraid not! In fact an attitude of asking “Why” tends to deepen self further into the mire of doubt and affirm the place your in.

As a solution how about paying less attention to the “why” you feel so bad, (because there are always reasons), and pay far more attention to the what. Focus on what will make you feel better and how to achieve this. Take some time and space, take a walk on the beach or lock yourself in the loo. Ask yourself what is needed here? What do I need? What can I do to help myself? Feel the difference? Moving from Why to How encourages you to take action. Yes there is a place to feel your distress but then move forward by doing something and choosing just one thing to help yourself.

We are born geniuses and then spend the rest of our lives convincing people we are not!